Blog 17 7 million Steps
30 Days (heading to Albuquerque 386 miles 20 days travelling 18 days walking a really tough stretch)
It’s been a nearly a week since I wrote. My apologies, but with Kelly away (she came back yesterday thank God) it has just been plain hard, mentally and physically. I am a very independent person and hate putting people out. I try and fit into people’s lives when I am living with them, which has meant a lot of challenges for me especially with eating, not having a car and walking! Most of the time the RV wasn’t with me as it was getting maintenance or having the new radio, backing system fitted… I am so grateful to Shirley & Bill and Mica and Jim – if they hadn’t stepped up the Walk would have stagnated for 2 weeks. I have come to realise we really need three travelling together. Kelly is busy and I spend so much time making sure my feet are okay, things slip. Mentally the walking should be getting easier but although my legs are holding up really well, my feet need attention. My spending the time looking after them is paying off. I am also very tired, no amount of training could have prepared me for this Walk.
The real issue for me is my mind, I miss my family so much, not being able to interact with my sisters, Josh, Amelia and AJ has been really challenging – I can’t make calls when I am walking as I have to be watching traffic, looking for pot holes and critters – I need my full concentration. Once I get back to the RV frankly many days I am “BRAIN DEAD,” and in no state to make calls send emails, write blogs.
Even taking pictures requires me to take my pack off, get my cell out – it all takes time and frankly once I am walking, it takes every ounce of me to keep going. I expect things will get better once we start moving towards the East Coast. We are trying to get a chest mounted camera to make it easier.
Yesterday something made me realise I am reliving mentally the early days after Josh’s accident, when my only focussed on him, nothing else mattered, I find myself in that mindset now! Nothing is more important than me getting up and walking. There are people relying on me to finish it and that is my only focus now. Yesterday Jim was going through the toilet requirements on the RV up until recently the weather has been great so we have relied on RV park services. Jim went through everything with Kelly and I meticulously – I listened intently, yet later on while walking I tried to remember what he had said and there was nothing. That’s when I realised what was going on with me!
I have no energy left for calling or answering emails at night, I have let down many people who I promised to ring or email things to! I know things will get easier but at the moment I need my full focus to be on the Warrior Momz Walk and finishing it.
I ask you all to be patient with me I know things will get easier, hell – it’s only been just over 30 Days.